You title it.

I've made wrong decisions before, but never realized it until it was too late. I don't think I can wait, but it did always seem as if the answer to this question would be told by fate. The silence is the worst part of it all, because that's when you think. That's when the thinkings that you kind of sort of wanted to forget, resurface and then follows regret holding hands with sorrow, laughing at your blunder that you won't ever be able to take back. Unless of course, it really was meant to be, then you get a second chance that not many receive. But maybe by then you wont want to believe that it was you and not her that fucked up. You need to slow down the tempo, and stay focused the room may start spinning but don't throw up. Then again, no one ever knows the answers to the future, whether it's a good mistake or a bad one, people say as you get older, you learn from your mistakes, well I've learned to make them in different ways, variations, and equations. I just change the variable and solve it using the wrong methods. Fuck, I don't know where this is going, I'm just writing as I go along. Add to the fact I've already lost many hours of sleep, contemplating about this, just wish I could close my eyes and have the answer come to me. If I had the Green lanterns ring, then I could just Will it to be. Even then I wouldn't know exactly what it would be, Yes or No? Maybe but even so, no concrete %100 percent, on the dollar answer. I'd probably backfire on myself, and create a blackhole that would swallow me up whole, that would be one way to solve this problem, who knows I guess I just got to wait and see, if it really was meant to be.

Spring break?!?!!111one

Chea! it's finally here...well technically I'm late and it's been here since tuesday for me but shhhhh....What to do what to do! Not much probably going to happen though I'm hoping for a lot of QT with my one and only for this upcoming week. Haven't been able to spend too much time with her lately, hopefully this will make up for it. Got to take care of a few things for school and REGISTER for next semester!!! Daamn it's getting late in the game for this type of behavior. Ugh, gotta get things right!

March 18th!

Its early, heh I guess by my definition (11:30Pm) Im on my way home I guess I got about another hour or so before I get to my apt, and the night more than made up for my day. It started with the waking up in a scare and looking at the clock 7:06AM... How the hell did I not get up?? Realizing I just definitely over slept by an hour I jump out of my bed, grab my underwear and run to the bathroom, still went to the shower and brushed my teeth quickly, thorough none the less, but quick (smh at you guys that would of just got dressed and left!) it was was like a blur! I check the clock, 7:27AM Damn im slow as hell, got dressed and I had to skip breakfast which really sucks because I try to eat 5 times a day! strike one run to the bus, catch the train, get to school, check the clock ugh already 8:50am.... my class starts at 8:30AM oh and did I mention I have my two midterms today? eh...strike two I finish the test with confidence that I did well at least! but wait...theres one more midterm in the horizon waiting to catch me off guard, the 2nd midterm was HORRIBLE! strike three...aaaaaaand im out? Fuck no, my blog, my rules I get one more chance! fast forward to my lunch break at work to something I've been planning for two weeks now because as bad as the day went its still a special day! Its my two year Anniversary with my girlfriend, Lucy! It sucks that we both had to work today and go to school but that doesn't mean I can't salvage what's left of the day. So fast forward to when I get out of work at night, and it takes an hour, the train ride from my job to her job, I give her a call Me: hey just made it to the bus, you busy? Her: Actually now, its pretty dead, but damn this is the only time we get to talk on the phone for the whole day (already 10:xxPM) Me: yeah I know, but what are you eating, it looks good (already standing 3 feet from her with her back towards me inside her store, the phone faces away from the door so she dint even notice me walk in!) I step in her view, her smile streched all the way around her face, expression speechless and surprised I put the flowers and card down on the counter. The whole days worries, bad midterm, and work stress just went out the window, her smile is beautifully strong enough to cause a start to collapse within itself, and that's what she does to my heart everytime I see her...HAPPY TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY! It was a long trip down the yellow brick road, been to the depths of the abyss, flown above the heavens, experienced the endless desolate calm of space all for her...2:xxAM now... too tired to look at the exact time and focus, so sleepy now...going to sle..zzzz.zZZZzzz